Okay, so you want to become a Radio Control Pilot. Here follows a few words of advice to all would-be r.c. Pilots.
To start with you will need to learn some of the terms and definitions that are used in r.c. related matters.
Here are a few examples;
Term......................... Definition Receiver: ………Someone who risks a possible jail sentence.
Dual rate:………. One less than third-rate.
Balsa bashing :……Something that rc pilots do when their wife, kids and dog have already been bashed.
Aerobatic Manoeuvres: ……….Things that planes’ do which causes the pilot to break wind.
Attitude: ………..Something all females have too much of.
Epoxy: ………….A rather unpleasant disease that comes from eating food with too many ‘E’ numbers.
Spar :………….A local grocery store.
G-hertz:. ……….Pain that comes from the over stimulation of a ‘G’ spot.
Nickel-metal-hydride: ……….A type of battery where the specific energy for material is approximately 70 W-h/kg (250 kJ/kg), compared to 40–60 W·h/kg for more common cadmium, or 100-160 W·h/kg for Li-ion. ……..What do you mean you don’t understand! :shock: Do you really think anyone does?…….. :lol:
Now that you know something about this hobby no doubt you’ll want to take up a more dynamic pastime, like knitting perhaps. But just in case I haven’t succeeded in putting you off, consider this;
If any rc pilot tells you he has NEVER crashed a model, he is either lying, or hasn’t flown very much. So, if you do take up this hobby, be prepared to go home from the flying area with a very large bag of kindling.
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Still interested? HHHmmmm…………… :?: .
It’s not uncommon to loose control of a model when it’s airborne. This can happen for a host of reasons, not least of which is “Pilot Panic.” (An affliction that pilots experience when the model seems to take on a mind of it’s own and doesn‘t appear to do what the pilot tells it to.)
The result can be that the model hits someone’s car, house, livestock, greenhouse ect. You might like to bear this in mind, and have a few excuses ready to disclaim responsibility for any possible damage caused.
Here follows a few suggestions,………….
It couldn’t possibly have been YOUR model that caused the damage because;
a) You were at home playing with your kids.
b) You were at home making something for your wife.
c) You and your wife were at home making some kids.
d) You and somebody else’s wife were making some kids!
e) At the time of the incident, you were in hospital having your wallet opened.
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Now, a word about getting involved in the running of club competitions………DON’T.
At some point in every flying club’s AGM, members will be asked if they are prepared to lend a hand in running the club competition.
Normally, at this time, most members suddenly feel ‘the call of nature’ and rush to the toilet, or feel the need for a ‘fag’ and exit for a smoke.
The only members who don’t take any kind of evasive action are the old timers. They just sit there, looking slightly puzzled and tapping their hearing aids.
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Of course, you might be foolish enough to ignore all of this good advise and actually start flying model aircraft.
In which case all I can say to you is, Welcome to the Party.
Keith
